Happy Allowing and Accepting

I recently was with a couple that was so allowing of each other that it made me just smile. If one person wanted to do an activity, they did it!  The key word was, “sure.”

Love reflects the art of allowing your partner to be who they are, without trying to change anything, including their opinions. I always like the idea of saying in any dispute:

“You may be right about that.”

“I understand your position.”

“I respect your opinion.”

“Perhaps we need to look into this further to gain greater understanding.”

What you are saying when you say the above is that you respect the person. You may not agree with what they are saying, but you are allowing the person to be who they are (even if you think they may be wrong). You are accepting them.

When you don’t allow for loving acceptance, it is a prescription for resentment. Allow, allow, allow. We are all on our own spiritual path; growth with either come or not, but nothing will happen if you don’t allow it to.

Love, Health and Happiness

Helen Berg, www.helen-berg.com

Expectations and Beliefs

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Below is an excerpt from “What is Love? by Helen Berg; pp. 49-50; all rights reserved:

Expectations and Beliefs

“Sometimes there are events that we don’t expect that side-blind us.  There was a study I read about once.  It was a rather cruel test.  One monkey was shocked regularly on the hour.  Another monkey was shocked randomly.  The one that was shocked regularly led a fairly normal life, because it knew the shock would come at a certain time, but that it would pass.  The monkey that was shocked at random times, lost its appetite, became withdrawn and grew old very fast.  It never knew when the next shock would come, or how long it would last, and thus it was startled every time.  It’s those side-blinding events that deeply affect us.  Because we don’t expect them, we never see them coming.  Often we bury those feelings the deepest.  Sometimes it takes hypnosis, or other psychotherapy, to bring these deep injuries out. Our expectations can make us suffer.  

           “I think pessimists have it over optimists. My friend once said that pessimists think everything is going to go wrong, and when it doesn’t, they’re pleasantly surprised.  Optimists, on the other hand, think everything is going to work out fine, and when it doesn’t, they’re crushed.  But I think my friend is wrong. What we put in our mind, what we believe will happen, usually does happen. If we think everything is going to go wrong, it probably will.  Not because everything is actually wrong, but rather, because the person thinks it is.  Belief is everything.  Thomas Edison made 199 attempts to invent the light bulb.  His friend asked him how he stayed positive after “failing” 199 times. Edison responded that he didn’t fail. He just learned 199 ways not to make a light bulb!

            “In love, when a relationship doesn’t work out, we can look at it as a failure, or we can look at it as just one more way not to do a relationship.  We can look at what worked, and what didn’t work.  We can expand those things that made us feel good, or made the other person feel good.  Those things that had the opposite effect supply contrast.  None of it is failing if you don’t look at it that way.  It’s simply learning.  When life is most difficult, and when we are most uncomfortable, if we pay attention, that is when we can learn volumes!  It’s like God is trying to get our attention with pain and suffering. God is saying, “Hey!  Look at this!  Why are you feeling or reacting the way you are?  There’s something to work on here!  And if you figure it out, you will grow in understanding about yourself. And next time you see that person, you can do better.”  It’s kind of an “ouch,” then “oh . . .” response.  The last thing you want to do is beat yourself up for something you did or didn’t do.  That doesn’t accomplish anything.  Look at why you did it, and why you feel uncomfortable now.  Dig deep.  The reason may be conditioning from your relationships with your parents or from a former relationship, or even a former life!

           “It’s a matter of shifting perception back to the positive (learning), and away from the negative (dwelling on the painful experience). When we do this, we eliminate the personal hells that can hold us for an eternity.”


End of excerpt.

You can purchase a copy of: “What Is Love?” by Helen Berg at: https://www.amazon.com/What-Love-Higher-Levels-Loving/dp/1504339916/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1589913047&sr=8-1

Love, health and happiness,

Helen Berg; http://www.helenberg.com

What Is True Intimacy?

True intimacy is like a dewy flower fully realized.

What is true intimacy? It’s a knowing of the other person’s likes, wants, needs and desires. It’s a knowing of their hopes and dreams, their deepest fears, and it’s knowing who they are right now and accepting where they are at on their spiritual journey. Once you truly know someone, you are on the path to true intimacy.

True Love is a complete acceptance of every aspect of another’s being; accepting all parts, rejecting nothing, listening to the deepest parts of them, knowing where they are at, but trying to change nothing, and realizing that it is the collection of their experiences, everything they’ve heard, read, experienced, and lived that makes them who they are. When you know and accept the other person fully, that is the beginning of true intimacy.  It has nothing to do with a physical act.

How do you distinguish whether making love is an extension of true intimacy or just another “high”? Ask yourself these questions: “does you partner truly know and understand you?” And, “do you really know and understand your partner?” And knowing all there is to know about the person you truly love, “do you accept every part of them?” And, “do they accept every part of you?” Acceptance is key; truly understanding with compassion is penultimate.

Since True Love has no conditions, and allows each person to fully be who they are, then each person must come to desire physical intimacy at their own pace. Generally that happens when a person feels safe. A person feels safe when they can be their true self around the other person. It also comes when a person feels powerful. True power comes with a knowing that no person, place or thing can ever shake the peaceful center within you because you know yourself, you have nurtured yourself, and you have allowed yourself to bloom into the person you truly are indifferent to the good opinions of others. Then you will be a flower, fully opened, fully realized.

True intimacy cannot be forced any more than one can force a flower to blossom. One should wait until one feels known, understood and accepted. You will know this has happened when you feel comfortable and at ease in your relationship every moment of every day–when there is regular harmony and joy. Then “making love” will be a true joining of mind, body and spirit, and there will be no reservations.

Love, Helen Berg

©Helen Berg’s Blog; http://www.helenberg.com

If Light is in Your Heart…

September is the month I was born.  When I was born, I left my true home and came to this earthly world.  It was a frightening place compared to the heavenly realm that I came from, but I am here for a reason.

I came to learn all that I failed to learn in prior lives.  I came to teach that which I have learned from prior existences to others.  I came to curiously explore human potential to see if we, as human, can transcend this earthly existence.  I came to learn how we can create heaven on earth, if only in our minds.

Home is not a place; it’s a feeling. You can return to that feeling everyday by finding a quiet place and nestling into the warmth of your own heart.  It is true that home is where the heart is.  No matter where you are you can always, always come home to rest in your heart where love abounds.  You will know you are home when you can sit quietly, and smile, knowing that your home is all around you no matter where you are.

“If light is in your heart, you will find your way home.”  Rumi  

If love is in your heart, you will find your peace.

Love, light, peace and happiness,

Helen Berg

©Helen Berg’’s Blog; www.helenberg.com

 

The World is Awakening

We are here for a purpose.

Many are finding out what their true purpose is.  Maybe it’s the heart of a caregiver, a nurse, or a doctor.  Maybe your true purpose is to be a helper.  Some help on the front lines, and some, like me, work from the energy that is present all around us; in the quiet, in the ether.

I started meditating when I was 18. Yoga was a thing back in the 70s, and I stretch and balanced my body in postures that have been around for thousands of years; postures that open up the energy centers of the body. Somehow being young helped.

Maybe it was because I had less dross floating around in my mind. Maybe it was because I had less defenses, and was more open. But it was a delicious experience that I expanded over time:  regression meditations, sitting meditations, walking meditations, meditations lying down, meditation in the lotus position. 

For awhile, things got so busy that meditating became more difficult.  I had to make time to find that quiet place. But I never stopped.  Now, once again, I have the time to focus on the energy.  Right now I am focusing on the earth. When I look at the trees I think:  the earth is so magnificent.  Does the she know there is a pandemic raging?  Maybe she does.  Maybe on a quantum level, this pandemic is healing our dear Mother Earth.

So I sit in God’s light sending out good energy to the earth, the universe and everyone in it.  I pray everyday that all sentient beings be free from suffering.  I pray we find peace in stillness, and that the earth will heal, and that we will heal, and find a new way.  A way, perhaps, that is more conscious of our Earth, and all we and she holds dear.  I pray, and meditate on the thought, that we, and our dear Mother Earth, find our balance.

Love, peace, health and happiness always and forever,

Helen Berg, https://helenberg.com

What Is Love?

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Excerpt from “What Is Love?” pp. 91-93 

“True symbiotic Love is pure, free, and enduring. It is a joyful dance of reciprocity between the giver and receiver. Neither person is the center of the equation. Love is the equation. We don’t act out of love; we act in a state of love at all times. It does not wax and wane depending on external or internal conditions. It is unconditional, unchanging and permanent. Our deepest desires and fears can be heard by our significant other because trust is abundant and both are filled with deep respect.

“True Love, Agape Love, embraces the totality of our experience here on earth, every emotion. Even if we make mistakes, and we will, True Love is different than raw desire or needy passion, because our motive is pure. Love can never abandon us unless we lose it in ourselves. We love because that is who we are. We love unconditionally all living creatures, all human beings, because love is all we know, and all we can be. . . .

“True Love is the threshold to all higher energies: bliss, which is a bubbling up of spirit; compassion, which is empathy for another; peace, a prolonged state of joy; and enlightenment, which is the level of powerful divine inspiration—the peak of human consciousness. . . .

“As we study love, become masters of love, and let go of our negative programming, we can know love, joy and peace as we have never known it before. We can have heaven on earth. . . .

“Today, I challenge you to begin anew, and reach for higher levels of loving. I invite you to bring the highest and best qualities of love, Agape love, True Love into all of your relationships.”

Love, peace and happiness,

Helen Berg, www.helen-berg.com

You can purchase a copy of “What is Love? at: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=helen+berg+what+is+love%3F&ref=nb_sb_noss

St. Valentine and Love

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The holiday most associated with February is Valentine’s Day. And so my blog will happily share what I’ve learned this month about the day.

Saint Valentine has long been associated with romantic love and Valentine’s Day. Since the 12th century, the day has become a recognized celebration of romantic love. Not only is St. Valentine a patron saint, but Valentine’s Day is a modern religious holiday.  Before that, people celebrated a mid February pastoral festival for purification and health. Mid February was also connected to the belief that birds began pairing at this time. Whatever the origin, Valentine’s Day is now widely recognized as a day for romance and devotion, and why not? It makes sense to have a day where the collective consciousness of the planet is focus on love, instead of a myriad of other feelings.

To truly celebrate love in all its glories on Valentine’s Day, get quiet and bring the feeling of love into your heart center when you first wake up. Let it bloom into a mediation of the most romantic ideas you can imagine. Perhaps someone has brought you flowers, or made it a special day for you by spending the day with you in love and celebration. Think of thoughts like these. Or think of the person or persons in your life that have made your life meaningful. Dwell on your heart swells and let them expand out until they fill up your whole being. Then let the feeling of love cascade like a waterfall out to your partner and the world.

Give hugs and kisses, and other expressions of your affection. Take a day off from work and walk and hold hands, or cuddle up on the couch. Be present every moment of this one day in love. It will bring renewed joy into your relationship.

If you are still visioning a partner, spiritually wrap your love around everyone you meet. Be extra kind, considerate, caring, compassionate and joyful. On this day when love is celebrated, you may bump into your life partner just around the corner. With your love-beam shining, anything is possible!

You will find that the more you spread love, the more it will naturally come back to you. And don’t forget: you are worthy of all the love in the world. So give yourself a great big hug, too. Spoil yourself with a warm bubble bath or buy yourself some little treat if no one else does. Remember, God’s love is always there, waiting for you to embrace it, and God will embrace you.

I’m sure St. Valentine will be smiling, as will our God in heaven, when you spread love out into the world. For me, I send you warm, cuddly snuggles and heart candies that say, “Joy” “Bliss” “Love” and “Be Mine.”

Happy Valentine’s Day.

Love, Helen Berg

©Helen Berg, www.helen-berg.com

You are Deserving of Love

You are wonderful, you are beautiful, I love you just the way your are.

Recently I listened to a “Love Meditation” by Deepak Chopra, one of my mentors. You may be able to find it on the internet. It’s about putting yourself in a state of love consciousness, and you’re not going to believe how to do it! You do it by saying this to yourself silently in the mirror, to someone who is looking at you with love, or to someone whom you manifest and imagine is looking at you with love:

I am a beautiful person;

I am a wonderful person;

I love myself exactly as I am.

Now it may seem strange that the best way to send out love to the world is to love yourself. But it’s true. Just try it. Imagine your mate or significant other looking at you with loving eyes, and everything about their face and body language says, “I love you.”  And silently in your mind you say:

I am a beautiful person;

I am a wonderful person;

I love myself exactly as I am.

Do you feel it?  Do you feel that feeling of buoyancy that happens when you give love to yourself?  It radiates out from you as love to others.  Isn’t it amazing how the love you are able to receive, is directly related to the amount of love you have for yourself?

That’s worth saying again: the amount of love you are able to give or receive is directly related to the amount of love that you have for yourself.

So, the next time someone says, “I love you,” look into their eyes, and smile, and say silently to yourself:

I am a beautiful person;

I am a wonderful person;

I love myself exactly as I am.

Bask in their love, then say, “Thanks for sharing your love with me. I love you, too.”

Love, health and happiness,

Helen Berg

©Helen Berg’’s Blog; www.helen-berg.com

I See Butterflies

One day I made an intention to see butterflies.  It was an experiment from a book I read by Pam Grout, called “E3.”  The main focus was on the notion that what you focus on expands. For the next 48 hours, I saw butterflies, a lot of them, beyond what I expected.  Butterflies flew up to my window when I was sitting in the car and hovered over the driver’s side window.  Butterflies almost crashed into me when I was riding my bike.  Butterflies, I noticed, were everywhere.  I just needed to focus on them and see them.

So it is with everything. 

What if you thought every morning of the ten things you liked about your life.  What if you spent ten minutes every morning being grateful for the gifts you have in your life.  What if you spent 10 minutes every day telling a person in your life how grateful you are for them.  Do you think your life would change?

Even with great conflicts in our theater movies, do you notice that most of the movies have a pretty good resolution at the end for the heroes and heroines?  Be a hero to yourself.  Focus on your good.  Bet a hero to others.  Focus on their good.  Be a hero to the world.  Focus on the good in people, and what we’ve accomplished for humankind.  Give positive reinforcement.  What you focus on expands.  See butterflies.

Love, peace and happiness,

Helen Berg

©Helen Berg’’s Blog; http://www.helenberg.com

The Journey

From a distance . . .

One day I woke up and knew I had changed dramatically.  But the process took a while.  Sometimes, I didn’t even know that I was making little progresses. But, in the aggregate, change happened and I began to see the effects in my life, little by little, until one day, I started to fly.  I was becoming the person I imagined I could be.

The most important thing is to take one step, and then another.  As you do, the next step appears.  The universe is conspiring to allow for your success. Then you start to flap your wings and jump, and the next thing you know, you’re flying!  It all begins with your desire, which moves to courage and a willingness to move forward.

Start by writing down what you want:  positive feelings, positive actions, positive dreams, and things you are grateful for.  Listen for the guidance.  Each year we are given an opportunity to change.  To begin again.  Start by waking up with positive thoughts, finish the day being grateful for the good things that happened in the day.  Gratitude will put your mind into a place where dreams can come true.  Once in the dream state, you can do anything.  

Write down your dreams.  Write down what you want to dream about.  Meditate on that.  You mind will expand, and so will you, as you move forward in your life.

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step…” Lao Tsu

Love, peace and happiness,

Helen Berg, 

©Helen Berg’’s Blog; www.helenberg.com.